Child Support Serendipity

Life can be serendipitous.
I received a call from the wife of an ex-boyfriend from many many years ago. She ranted in my ear about how he left her and their kids and is shacking up with some other woman who is also married, by the way. The new girlfriend is pregnant and so wifey is blowing up my ear about him being a deadbeat dad.
This guy broke my heart back in high school and we both moved on and married and had kids, etc. and now... well... now... what can I say???

She knows who I am and she um..knows that her husband had re-connected with me (accidentially) a few years back and that we maintained an e-mail friendship for awhile. She was not happy about it and I was not happy that he began to profess his continual love for me, so it stopped. So for her to reach out to me ...the poop must have really hit the fan.

She has the spark...!

I finally reached the woman I was worried about. She's fine for now. She promises to call tomorrow because she explained that she just started a new job and is in orientation. Her plan is to save up enough money so that she can leave that guy. Good for her!!! I remain worried though because he does not know she is working and she does not want to let him know. I am reminded of the movie "Sleeping with the enemy" with Julia Roberts when she took swimming lessons so that she could fake her death and leave her abusive spouse.
We have a social worker in the office and I will speak with her tomorrow after I speak with this woman again. I hope that our social worker has some known resources which can help her to get out sooner than later. Back on the child support rant -- I can't wait to get this creep.

Child Support and Domestic Violence

There are times when child support and domestic violence are closely if not directly related. A woman called me last week and wanted to know how she can collect child support from the father of her children who she said told her "I'm not going to give you any more money. If you want any money, take me to child support". This woman lives with the father of her two children, yet he has announced that he is cutting off the phone and the cable and will not give her anything anymore, not even to buy food for the kids.
I met this woman at a seminar a few weeks back. I never thought that I would hear from her again. She was meek and never looked me in the eye. She looked down towards the ground when we spoke privately. I don't claim to be a psychic but something inside of me told me that she was being abused, physically, emotionally and mentally. Control of money is one aspect of abuse.
She was due to call me again yesterday so that we could do a complete intake and start the process but I have not heard from her yet. I called her today but no answer. I will call again later. It will be difficult but I now have to stop thinking about her and get my head back into the 'present' and return calls to a list of people waiting to hear from me. Even still, I am feeling haunted by her. Sometimes it happens like that.
This guy is a bus driver. I could find him in a pinch and she could start collecting within a few short months. But I can't do a thing until I hear from her...
I wonder if she will call back.

A Young Mom Walked Into My Office Today...

So a young mom walked into my office today. It is not my job to ask people up front how old they are so of course I didn't. She looked to be between 18-20. She had such a look of desperation in her face... and a look of hope... almost a pleading in her eyes. She asked about my book posted in the window. I told her about about it and then asked her to tell me what's going on. She started to cry but tried so much to hold back the tears. She wasn't here for sympathy or for a shouldere to cry on, she was here for information and maybe someone to give her some relief from her hopelessness.
She told me that her baby is 8months old and that she has been receiving food stamps for about 10 months now. The baby's daddy does not pay support and pretty much has dropped out of the picture. He used to work as a stock boy at a groocery store but does not work there anymore and she does not know where to find him. Welfare is not helping. They told her to find him and then they would go after him. (Uh...isn't that supposed to be their job??)
I did my best to console this young woman who did not want to be consoled (but welcomed it), she just wants help.
So what to do for her??? My new book is set for a street and ship release date of Oct 1. I told her to come back next week and that I would sell her a book and the book should help a lot. I told her about our other services which I know she cannot afford and told her that we are waiting on some news on a grant which would possible allow me to service her depending on where she lives. (Whew! I found that she does live within the service area). What if this particular grant does not come? What if it does not come in time for her? She needs help now. What if this $19.98 book that I will sell to her is $19.98 that she needs to buy pampers? What if, what if, what if....
I sit here this afternoon thinking about this young woman and her baby and wondering where daddy was this morning when she was crying in my office in front of a woman she doesn't know at all.